Be Kind to Yourself

Last week I said something in my video that I want to tap into this week. This wasn’t the blog I thought I would post today but I am in desperate need of this reminder for myself so I thought it would be a perfect time to dig deep into this concept together!

Last week, I said in my video….You’re not crazy!!

I said that because if you are like me, sometimes you might feel crazy. If you're like me, you may even feel crazy in the positive and in the negative. Sometimes I feel crazy because I can’t believe I struggle with what I struggle with and other times when I am living in fearlessness and operating in who I believe God has called me to be I also feel crazy (kinda like how I feel about doing the videos with my blog lol) But it is so important that although we may feel a little off the charts sometimes, we’re not. And when you are dealing with the pressures of this world it is of utmost importance that you…

Be Kind To Yourself!

This was advice that was given to me as I sat before wise counsel (okay, let’s be honest, a therapist). I sat there exclaiming how disappointed I was in myself, how frustrated I was that I couldn’t turn it around, how “stupid” my struggles were. In my mind, I needed to pull my big girl panties up and get over it! She looked at me with all seriousness and said as serious as she could, “Kira, you need to be kind to yourself!”

She was right! I did need to be kind to myself. I would die before I ever talked to another person like that. I can’t even imagine it. A friend coming to me telling me about their struggles and me looking them straight in the face and saying, “that’s stupid”, “you should be able to overcome that,” “I can’t believe you're dealing with something like that, what’s wrong with you?!” Hello!! I would not just get the world's worst friend award but world’s worst person award! I would NEVER talk to someone like that. I would never even have thoughts like that toward a friend and their personal struggles. I would always have compassion and love toward them no matter what.

So why in the world did I think I had the right to talk to myself that way? And how damaging?! Whether those words come from another person or come from yourself they give you no room for recovery. They shame you. And you may or may not know this but God is NOT in the shaming business.

So guess what? No matter how you might feel...you’re not crazy and you're not stupid! Whatever it is that you are dealing with, it’s okay! You are not alone and you are not a terrible person because you may be struggling with bad habits or attitudes, or the inability to let go of something, or even something more life altering. You know what you are….you are a daughter or son of Christ. You are created with a purpose and that purpose is alive in you despite any struggle or situation you may be in. You are not perfect and that’s okay but what is important is that you don’t give up on yourself. You need to keep putting one step in front of the other and you are not going to be able to do that if you keep beating yourself up. Give yourself the grace and mercy that you have been promised.

And if you’re thinking you have a right to negative self talk because no one could possibly understand what you're going through. Guess what...Christ does. Imagine this...after he died on the cross, he went to hell. We mostly just talk about how he rose. But before that happened he went to hell and he experienced every struggle, every stronghold, every consequence of sin, all the ugliness, all the pain, and all the feelings that accompany the specific issues that we deal with. He knows what you're going through because he experienced it first hand.

Isn’t your compassion even greater toward someone that is experiencing a hardship that you have already been through? If you’ve lost a loved one and then your friend does, you know the pain they are feeling. When you have struggled with depression and then your friend does, you know how hard it is, you know the grace, patience, and love they need.

And this is how Christ is looking at you. Christ is not saying I can’t believe she would do that. He’s not saying she is a mockery to my name. He’s not shaming you. His heart is literally aching and pounding for you, knowing what you are going through, knowing exactly how you feel.

But then Christ rose. He made freedom possible. So not only is he looking at you with compassion and understanding. He’s saying.

It’s okay…

Just keep walking…

Just keep trying…

You are wonderfully and fearfully made…

You are the apple of my eye…

Nothing you do can separate you from my love…

Your situation does not define you...

Your purpose is hidden in me…

Keep searching…

Keep fighting…

Lean on me…

Persevere...

You're doing better than you think you are…

Freedom is here for you…

And ultimately...Be Kind To Yourself!!

Choose today to end shameful self talk. Unconditional love is living inside of you. Dive into it. Stop beating yourself up. You're not crazy. You're not stupid. You're struggles are not stupid. They are real and they may take work to overcome but they are not who you are. Freedom is before you, your purpose is alive in you, and fearlessness is in your reach.