The Secret Password: Thanksgiving

Happy day after Thanksgiving! I hope your bellies are full but your hearts are even fuller. I wanted to take some time this week to talk about what Thanksgiving means to me this year. I’ve been talking a lot about living the abundant life that God has called us to live, overcoming our hard seasons, and living fearlessly for the Lord. These have all been powerful and true words but a lot of times it is easier said than done. We believe in God’s blessings for us but actually feeling His blessings in our lives is not always the case. Also we believe in God’s strength to help us overcome but we struggle to actually have the breakthrough manifest in our lives. But because we can’t feel it or see if yet doesn’t determine whether it is there.

So when we are standing at the door of our blessings, our healing, our joy, our restoration, and all the other goodness of God, but we just can't seem to reach them what do we do? According to the word of God the door is most likely bulging with pressure of the fullness of the joy, peace, and love He promises but here we are feeling like we are standing on the other side.

I imagine us as little kids, standing at the door crying out…. “Let me in!!” We want so badly to come into God’s presence and be covered and filled with his love and peace! I can’t tell you how often I repeat to myself scripture and truths to remind myself I have access to these things. I ask God’s love to overflow in my life, I beg to feel it, I beg for fullness but it is not everyday that I actually tangibly feel it in my life. Do I doubt that it’s there for me? No, I believe fully in the word of God…but in certain seasons or certain days I still can’t feel all of it.

So I continue to cry out…”LET ME IN!” And just like in our childhood, it was so annoying when your older sibling held the door close just to say…WHAT’S THE PASSWORD? You can’t come in without knowing the secret password! You would try word after word…sometimes if you had a gracious sibling or friend they would end up deciding a word was good enough and let you pass the threshold but you may have had a sibling or friend that used this as a tactic to keep you out. No word you came up with would ever work and they left you there trying over and over again knowing they were never going to let you in.

Well our God says, “Ask and you shall receive!” He is the friend that will let us in.  So what keeps us from entering into his presence and experiencing his love? What blocks us from our blessing? What hinders us from his will for our lives?

What’s the secret password?!?

God says, in Philippians 4:6, “...with THANKSGIVING give your requests to God.” We’re requesting to receive what is behind the door. There is a longing in our hearts for God’s word to manifest in our lives. There is nothing wrong with asking for these things, they are God’s promise to us, but He requires us to approach Him a certain way.

In Psalm 95:2 the bible says, “Let us enter his presence with Thanksgiving.” In Psalm 100:4 it goes on to say, “...enter His gates with Thanksgiving...For the Lord is Good and His love endures forever; His faithfulness continues through all generations.”

I’m writing this post in the early hours of Thanksgiving morning. In the last 2 weeks I personally have been begging to feel God’s love. I know He loves me but I want to feel overjoyed with the fullness of Christ’s overflowing unfailing love for who He has created me to be. I have cried out! I am still struggling!

I hope this post helps you like it is helping me right now. I’m switching the way I approach the gate of His presence. Begging….”Let me in!” doesn’t grant me access to what’s inside. But today I am switching it. I’ve been given the secret password….

Father God, Thank you for your love! Thank you that you will fill my heart, thank you that you are love and you’re love is unfailing! I am so thankful that no matter what I do, don’t do, get right or get wrong, you never leave me. Thank you that you look upon me and call me precious. Thank you that every morning when I wake up you are there. You are gracious, you are my strength, you are my rock, and I am so thankful for you! Thank you for the way you love me through my husband and son! The love they show me is beyond measurable and I am so grateful!

There’s nothing wrong with asking to enter into God’s presence and receive His blessing but just remember to enter it with Thanksgiving. Give thanks to all that He’s done, all the good things in your life, and for all that He is. His love endures forever. Sometimes He graciously blesses us without us even asking but here is where I challenge you and myself to unlock the areas that we feel are blocked. There is peace for our anxiety, love for our broken hearts, joy for our sorrows, comfort for our loneliness, favor in our finances, mending for our families, and the list can go on forever. Let’s use the secret password. Let’s give thanks!

Your Wage is Still the Same

How great does it feel to live in purpose! To wake up everyday and know that you are doing exactly what you are suppose to be doing, embracing life, accessing relationship with the Lord, actually feeling his presence in our life, not messing up constantly. These seasons feel good and I welcome them ALWAYS! But how do we deal with the seasons that weren’t so good and the person we blame the most is ourselves. Maybe we let bitterness or entitlement have room in our lives affecting how we treat the ones we love, or maybe we got out of the routine of going to church, serving, or spending daily time with God, or maybe we let our health slip and now we look in the mirror or at our doctor’s report and see the signs of a season that we wouldn’t call victorious. We weren’t living fearlessly, we were living comfortably and that leaves us to look back and think, “Gosh, have I even made a difference at all over the last 3 months, year, or even years?”

If you haven’t read my post about making your comeback you should go back and read it now. There I go in depth on how we can make a comeback in our lives when we feel as if we’ve missed the mark. But today I want to talk about the guilt and the shame that can follow a disappointing season of life even after we decide to make positive changes in our lives. See, the enemy wants to place lies in us when we try to walk fearlessly for God. He wants us to stay stuck. But we know that we can press on to the high call of God at anytime we choose too (philippians 3:14). And when we choose to do this, the enemy feels that loss and he undoubtedly will change his game in order to keep us from moving forward.

Guilt and shame are toxic to living a fearless life for God. They blind us to the identity we have in Christ. They fill our mind with lies and discouragement to move forward and do, say, and act as the Holy Spirit leads us to. Ultimately they tell us we are unworthy. They define us by what we’ve done instead of who we are. And they keep us from impacting those around us.

I want to look at a few stories in the bible to shine light on what God thinks of our wayward seasons. In Matthew,chapter 18, we are given a picture of the wandering sheep. The scripture tells us if 1 out of 99 sheep wander off, God is happier about that one wandering sheep who returns than he is the 99 sheep that never left. God does not want to see a single one of his children perish. It brings joy and honor to His name when, although you have lost sight of purpose, discipline, focus, etc. for a moment, you make a decision to repent, redirect, and return to following Him. Your eyes, ears, and heart may have been draped with a “closed sign” for a while but the moment you flip it to “open” Christ walks right in and is more excited than he was before. Isn’t this so different from how we make ourselves feel about our wayward seasons? We commit to change and choose to walk in newness but we walk into the new season with baggage from the last. We walk into it with hopes to do and be better but we also take with us the identity that we have not gotten right before.

If you keep marching through the book of Matthew you will reach a story in Chapter 20 that helped me to experience freedom from my own shame. My shame was caused by a season where I wasn’t allowing God to move through me. I was that person that looked back and thought I had wasted so much time, so much purpose, and impacted no one when I should have been. I counted myself as “less than” because of it. In these verses it tells a story about a landowner who hired workers at different times of the day to go work in his vineyard. Some started working at 9 in the morning and some started working as late as 5 in the afternoon. When it came to the end of the day and it was time for the workers to receive their wages, the ones that came to work late in the day received the same wages as those who started working in the morning. It didn’t matter when they came to work, it just mattered that they showed up. And in the first verse of this passage the bible states that this story is a comparison to the Kingdom of Heaven!

So in God’s eyes and according to his Kingdom, no matter when we decide to get to work for the Lord His blessing, grace, and love will be the same as someone who may have spent their entire life serving God without stumbling. When I realized this it was so freeing!

Hear me! You did not miss out on your blessing! You still have a purpose! You may have not accessed it in one season but as soon as you show up to work for the Lord your wages will be equal as if you never took time off! WOW! That is not how it works in the world! We pay for our time off! But our gracious heavenly Father says, “Come, your debt has already been paid. My grace and love is still sufficient for you and NOTHING you do can separate you from my love!”

Ya’ll! God loves you! And He is not looking at the season where you left Him he is looking at the fact you are before Him now and He is EXCITED! He is happier about you coming back to Him and desiring to be fearless for Him than he is all those who have never left His side. You’ve made a choice to be in relationship with your Father and allow Him to direct your steps. Shame is reminding you of the “yeah, but you did this.” God is saying, “Yeah but you’re here now.” I read in a book once that the way you know the difference from the enemy's voice and God’s voice is that the enemy’s voice will leave you feeling condemned and God’s voice will leave you feeling affirmed.

Look at how you are talking to yourself and how you are viewing your past. Are you feeling condemned by it? Or are you feeling affirmed that although it happened God promises redemption. 

Shake off the past. Christ shed His blood so that you could return to your Father without condemnation at anytime you choose. If you are feeling shame and guilt from your past, you are the one putting it there. God is not holding it against you and you shouldn't either! No matter where you've been, what you've done, what you haven't done, and no matter how small or big...your wage is still the same!! 

Be Kind to Yourself

Last week I said something in my video that I want to tap into this week. This wasn’t the blog I thought I would post today but I am in desperate need of this reminder for myself so I thought it would be a perfect time to dig deep into this concept together!

Last week, I said in my video….You’re not crazy!!

I said that because if you are like me, sometimes you might feel crazy. If you're like me, you may even feel crazy in the positive and in the negative. Sometimes I feel crazy because I can’t believe I struggle with what I struggle with and other times when I am living in fearlessness and operating in who I believe God has called me to be I also feel crazy (kinda like how I feel about doing the videos with my blog lol) But it is so important that although we may feel a little off the charts sometimes, we’re not. And when you are dealing with the pressures of this world it is of utmost importance that you…

Be Kind To Yourself!

This was advice that was given to me as I sat before wise counsel (okay, let’s be honest, a therapist). I sat there exclaiming how disappointed I was in myself, how frustrated I was that I couldn’t turn it around, how “stupid” my struggles were. In my mind, I needed to pull my big girl panties up and get over it! She looked at me with all seriousness and said as serious as she could, “Kira, you need to be kind to yourself!”

She was right! I did need to be kind to myself. I would die before I ever talked to another person like that. I can’t even imagine it. A friend coming to me telling me about their struggles and me looking them straight in the face and saying, “that’s stupid”, “you should be able to overcome that,” “I can’t believe you're dealing with something like that, what’s wrong with you?!” Hello!! I would not just get the world's worst friend award but world’s worst person award! I would NEVER talk to someone like that. I would never even have thoughts like that toward a friend and their personal struggles. I would always have compassion and love toward them no matter what.

So why in the world did I think I had the right to talk to myself that way? And how damaging?! Whether those words come from another person or come from yourself they give you no room for recovery. They shame you. And you may or may not know this but God is NOT in the shaming business.

So guess what? No matter how you might feel...you’re not crazy and you're not stupid! Whatever it is that you are dealing with, it’s okay! You are not alone and you are not a terrible person because you may be struggling with bad habits or attitudes, or the inability to let go of something, or even something more life altering. You know what you are….you are a daughter or son of Christ. You are created with a purpose and that purpose is alive in you despite any struggle or situation you may be in. You are not perfect and that’s okay but what is important is that you don’t give up on yourself. You need to keep putting one step in front of the other and you are not going to be able to do that if you keep beating yourself up. Give yourself the grace and mercy that you have been promised.

And if you’re thinking you have a right to negative self talk because no one could possibly understand what you're going through. Guess what...Christ does. Imagine this...after he died on the cross, he went to hell. We mostly just talk about how he rose. But before that happened he went to hell and he experienced every struggle, every stronghold, every consequence of sin, all the ugliness, all the pain, and all the feelings that accompany the specific issues that we deal with. He knows what you're going through because he experienced it first hand.

Isn’t your compassion even greater toward someone that is experiencing a hardship that you have already been through? If you’ve lost a loved one and then your friend does, you know the pain they are feeling. When you have struggled with depression and then your friend does, you know how hard it is, you know the grace, patience, and love they need.

And this is how Christ is looking at you. Christ is not saying I can’t believe she would do that. He’s not saying she is a mockery to my name. He’s not shaming you. His heart is literally aching and pounding for you, knowing what you are going through, knowing exactly how you feel.

But then Christ rose. He made freedom possible. So not only is he looking at you with compassion and understanding. He’s saying.

It’s okay…

Just keep walking…

Just keep trying…

You are wonderfully and fearfully made…

You are the apple of my eye…

Nothing you do can separate you from my love…

Your situation does not define you...

Your purpose is hidden in me…

Keep searching…

Keep fighting…

Lean on me…

Persevere...

You're doing better than you think you are…

Freedom is here for you…

And ultimately...Be Kind To Yourself!!

Choose today to end shameful self talk. Unconditional love is living inside of you. Dive into it. Stop beating yourself up. You're not crazy. You're not stupid. You're struggles are not stupid. They are real and they may take work to overcome but they are not who you are. Freedom is before you, your purpose is alive in you, and fearlessness is in your reach.

Anxious Heart

The walls are caving in. My mind is going a million miles a minute. My heart is about to beat out of my chest. I'm not even really sure if I’m breathing. And honestly I don’t even know why. But I know it needs to stop, I know I need PEACE...

Anxiety. It’s been the biggest struggle for me over the last year. Somewhere, somehow I let the enemy in and he wrapped anxiety around my heart like a venomous snake. The feeling was strange to me at first. I had never had much experience with it but had heard so many people talk about feeling anxious. I related it to worrying because that is the level of anxiety I understood but now I know it’s much more than worry. It’s paralyzing and it can cause a serious panic to the one that is wanting to resist it.

It is a common and growing struggle that so many of us are dealing with...brought on to us from the unmet needs of security and support. I see it in the kids I work with everyday and my heart breaks for them knowing how trapped they feel by this attack.

In March of this year I wrote this in my journal….

“I feel myself getting anxious and out of control. It’s like my insides get hyper and I look for things to do that don't need to be done.

Unnecessary busyness….

I NEED TO BREATHE AND FOCUS!”

I love my description when I said my insides get hyper. Do you ever feel like this? Catching yourself in a whirlwind of unnecessary busyness brought on by anxiety and the inability to simply rest. I’ve learned over time that these actions are us trying to numb this feeling of anxiety. Instead of looking it straight in the face and forcing it to change we allow it to drive us. I have received so much deliverance since I wrote these words that I can now feel compassion on the “me” who was writing this months ago. And that same compassion goes out to any of you who find yourself in emotional states of no self control and panic. When you feel your heart beating out of your chest and your breath is shortened and the reason why is so hard to even fathom because you are so paralyzed. You become desperate for peace but at the same time you are hopeless for it and it’s absolutely terrifying.

So what do we do with an anxious mind and heart? I’ve lost many battles against it but I have had my victories as well and I now have some tools to beat my anxiety.

First - STOP.

Stop what you’re doing. Put down the dishes. Put down the food. Pull over the car. There is a battle in your mind and no “weapon of this world”, no task, duty, piece of cake, workout, etc. is a comparable weapon for what you are dealing with. You think you're fighting your anxiety with your busyness but you're only letting it spin you faster. So STOP.

Second - BREATHE.

Calm your heart and search your mind. As you breathe you are allowing your body to relax and you will be able to clearly see what’s going on in your mind and redirect it and renew it.

Third - Build your confidence in WHO is taking care of you.

Like I said before, being anxious can be brought on because we do not feel confident that we are secure or supported, but where people and life have let us down in these areas, God will not. Know that you are in His hands. He can fulfill your every need.

Fourth - Build your confidence in WHAT God’s presence can bring you.

He is the Prince of Peace. He is your Rock. You can not hide from His Presence and He will not move. He is with you always and His peace is available to you always.

Fifth - Build your confidence in the IDENTITY God has given you.

You matter! You are a masterpiece! You’re okay. You are a daughter or son to the mighty King of all Kings.

Sixth - DON’T MOVE until it’s gone.

You can manage anxiety or you can overcome it. You are an overcomer!

Lastly - IDENTIFY and RESIST.

Once you're on the other end of your anxiety try to figure out what triggered it. Was it a person, a situation, something you were trying to avoid, a lie you believed, etc.? If you can identify it then you will be able to put healthy boundaries in place to resist those situations later.

I can tell you that I still have my moments of anxiety and I hate them. But I can also tell you that I have also had my great moments of peace. Sometimes it has taken laying on the floor and seriously believing and making myself feel the peace of God flow over me like a river. If anyone would have walked in my house in these moments I know they would have thought I’d lost my mind. But they would have been right. I had lost my mind in those moments but God says that he gives us power, love, and a SOUND MIND! And his peace, which transcends all understanding, will guard our hearts and minds. I believe God’s promises are true so I would do whatever I could to access them!

If you experience anxiety at any level I want you to hear me loud and clear when I say this. I understand it's real, I understand it's powerful, I understand that it is all encompassing. And although I have made it look so simple by listing out "7 tools to use against it" I know for a fact it is not simple and yes these tools work but there is nothing easy about using them. But I KNOW God's power is stronger than our anxiety, His spirit is within you, and you have what it takes to beat it. Give yourself time and patience but believe that there is a life for you that is free from anxiety. Then do whatever it takes to access it. Somedays it may beat you but other days it won't and with every moment of peace you experience you get a little bit closer to your freedom. Keep fighting!