It isn't easy but it is Possible

I dedicate this post to my Uncle, Brian Keith Paul.
Today is his birthday and I wish he was here.

In November 2006 my family went through something awful. We lost a dad, a husband, a brother, a son, a best friend, and an uncle. Today I am not here to talk about the tragedy, the pain, the sorrow, etc. but here to talk about the strength, love, passion of a man and a family and ultimately our GOD.

Loosing Brian was the hardest thing this family has been through and there is hardly a but that can come after that statement BUT here are a few :) BUT the way the Lord designed our family to be together during every hard time was amazing. My family lives in Wilmington and the rest of my mom's side lives in West Virginia. We some how still remained as close as ever. My cousins are not my cousins they are my brother and sisters. My parents and their parents are best friends and have been since they were little. My mamaw and papaw are hands down the BEST mamaw and papaw in the world. When we found out that Brian had cancer Lenza was in Wilmington with me, we were together. When Brian had his intensive surgery at Wake Forest, we were together. Before we found out the cancer had come back we all spent the week in Wilmington on the beach and hanging out, we were together. When Lenza won homecoming queen and we got to see my uncle released from the hospital to walk across the field with her, we were all together. And when the day had come for my sweet uncle to be with the Lord, we were all together. Our houses were over 7 hours a part but how good is God to know that we needed each other. We were one. We were each other's strength, each other's smile, each other's comfort.

My uncle was a man of courage and fight. I learned a lot from him in this sense. When he saw something that needed to be done he went after it. Some would say he was stubborn and in some ways he was but he still got the job done :) He was hilarious and never passed up a time to be completely ridiculous to make everyone laugh, you should see some of our home videos! On his birthday, he loved cakes made out of donuts, he loved to watch his kids succeed, he supported them like crazy and loved them to no end.

I think about him not being here with us now and us not being able to celebrate his birthday and it makes me sad, but then I imagine him around the throne of God, worshiping him, singing, loving, etc. and I know he is in a far better party than we could have ever thrown for him here.

A woman prayed for me one time and she referred to my uncle and said...who ever you lost is surely with the Lord. Praise God! She was right and no matter how much I miss him here I push through to realize where he is and I smile. I have an amazing family, a strong family, and a loving family. It hasn't been easy but it has been possible. For the Lord will not give you anything you can not handle.

Just needed a moment to get this out. Sometimes it is hard to bring something like this back to the surface but today I choose to look at the few BUTS that there are to the difficulties of loosing my uncle.

I love you Uncle Brian and I am happy that you are having the best Birthday today! I wish more than anything that you could be here this summer for my wedding! I know you would love Nic and there is no doubt that I can feel your support from heaven :) Miss you always...

I end saying the one things that can always be said...OUR GOD IS GOOD!

Love you all,

Kira